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Old Farmer

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight and
bull-strong.

* Keep skunks and bankers and lawyers at a distance.

* Life is simpler when you plow around the stump.

* A bumble bee is considerably faster than a John
Deere tractor.

* Words that soak into your ears are whispered…not
yelled.

* Meanness don’t jes’ happen overnight.

* Forgive your enemies. It messes up their heads.

* Do not corner something that you know is meaner than
you.

* It don’t take a very big person to carry a grudge.

* You cannot unsay a cruel word.

* Every path has a few puddles.

* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

* The best sermons are lived, not preached.

* Most of the stuff people worry about ain’t never
gonna happen anyway.

* Don’t judge folks by their relatives.

* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Live a good honorable life. Then when you get older
and think back, you’ll enjoy it a second time.

* Don’t interfere with somethin’ that ain’t botherin’
you none.

* Timing has a lot to do with the outcome of a rain
dance.

* If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to
do is stop diggin’.

* Sometimes you get, and sometimes you get got.

* The biggest troublemaker you’ll probably ever have
to deal with, watches you from the mirror every
mornin’.

* Always drink upstream from the herd.

* Good judgment comes from experience, and a lotta
that comes from bad judgment.

* Lettin’ the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier
than puttin’ it back in.

* If you get to thinkin’ you’re a person of some
influence, try orderin’ somebody else’s dog around.

* Live simply. Love generously. Care deeply. Speak
kindly. Leave the rest to God.

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